Managing Your Teens and Their Cell Phone

Fourteen-year-old Emily was thrilled. After six months of intense lobbying, she finally convinced her parents to buy her a cell phone. Emily’s parents gave her a cell phone with the stipulation that she could use only 500 minutes per month. They warned her not to go over her minutes and showed her how to check her remaining minutes at any time. Emily wholeheartedly agreed and promised not to go over her minutes; after all, 500 minutes seemed like a lot of time. At the end of the first month, Emily’s parents were shocked to discover that Emily’s cell phone bill was more than $1,200. They were furious with Emily and took away her cell phone. She would pay her parents back over the next year doing extra chores around the house.

I met Emily’s parents when they came to me to help them figure out how to handle this issue with Emily. When asked how this could have happened, Emily would repeat with embarrassment and tears, “I don’t know.” Her parents were frustrated and angry that Emily would do this. I let them know that they are not alone; this is a very common problem reported by parents. I also let them know that it is predictable.

In the past few years, getting out of debt has surpassed losing weight as the No. 1 New Year’s resolution according to a 2008 survey conducted by Opinion Research Corporation. This shift indicates a growing awareness of the importance and value of living a debt-free life. Many Americans get into problems with debt in adulthood because they were never taught the basic fundamentals of money management as kids. Parents are in the unique position to give their children the tools to avoid consumer debt by learning to manage their resources. But how do you capture a teenager’s attention to teach them the process of budgeting?

Enter the cell phone. Few inventions have captured the interest and passion of teens as much as the cell phone. It gives them instant access to the enthralling moment-to-moment status updates in their friends’ lives. With Facebook alerts and text messages, close contact doesn’t even require talking. Much to the surprise of their parents (and themselves), teens can end up sending thousands of text messages within a few days. Because the part of the brain that is responsible for planning, foresight and anticipation of consequences is not fully developed in adolescents, it is predictable that they will misjudge and mishandle their resources. Without practice experiencing the consequences of poor impulse control and judgment, these problems can persist into adulthood.

When used as a learning tool, cell phones can be a highly effective method for teaching budgeting, impulse control, self-control and the importance of delayed gratification. This is how it works: Instead of giving your children the ability to mistakenly rack up a $1,000 cell phone bill, give them prepaid minutes for the month. For example, a prepaid calling card could provide 500 minutes for the month. When the 500 minutes are gone, their cell phones no longer work. If they burn through their minutes in the first five days, they have to wait until the first of the month to reactivate their phone, or you could give them extra chores so they can earn more minutes for the current month. In addition to protecting your family’s financial health, you give your teenagers the opportunity to learn through trial and error without the threat of disappointing anyone but themselves. The intensity of adolescent cell phone withdrawal syndrome will be much more effective than any amount of parental scolding or lecturing in teaching your teen the importance of managing his or her resources well. The self-control skills they need to keep their cell phone alive all month are the same ones they will need to be good stewards of their money as adults.